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How to Convince Your Parents for Marriage: Understanding and Explaining the Increasing Importance of Nikkah

Let’s be honest. The society we live in brims with an overwhelming amount of emotional and physical triggers that can send your desires into overdrive.

Falling into sin, dating, and indulging in haram is no sweat. Marriage, on the other hand, the one-point solution for all of these problems, has been made hard, if not impossible for the younger lot. 

And sometimes, it’s none other than our own parents who stand in the way of us completing half our religion. 

So, before you go deeper into figuring out how to convince your parents for marriage, understand why you need to get married. Once you know the reason yourself, help your parents understand it. If they see where you are coming from, it might be easier for them to get on the same page as well. 

Now, for some tips. 

How to Convince Parents for Marriage: 4 Practical and Doable Tips

Islam holds certain relationships in high regard. Parent-child and husband-wife relationships are two of them. 

If the Quran honours the husband-wife relationship, it also underlines the importance of honouring your relationship with your parents. 

Allah SWT says in the Quran: And your Lord has decreed that you worship not except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Quran [17:23]

So, we need to strike a balance between honouring our parents while also respecting our own desires as we try and get them to agree to our marriage. 

Based on this idea, here are some tips to help you convince your parents for marriage:

Show them You Are Ready

If your parents are not agreeing to your marriage, they may have a valid reason to do so. 

Marriage comes with lots of responsibilities. Unlike what many people think, it is more than just a casual relationship where two people come together and celebrate their love for the rest of their lives. Yes, love is an element of marriage but there is more to it. 

Whether you are a girl or a guy, if you get married, you will have to bear the burden of certain responsibilities that you may not have right now. 

Many parents believe their kids are not responsible enough to carry the load that comes with marriage and can foresee a disastrous future for them and their spouse. A future where both kids, in their immaturity, clash often and ruin each other’s peace and lives. 

This fear of skirmishes results in the parents being reluctant or completely against their young children’s marriage. 

The solution? Show them you are ready to take on all the responsibilities of marriage. 

Start taking on some of the chores you may be expected to do after marriage and do them well. Be consistent and prove to your parents that you will not bring in chaos in your life and theirs if they agree to your marriage. 

Tell them You Want to Get Married

Most of us want our parents to read our minds and initiate the marriage process for us. This, however, rarely works

If you are ready to get married, communicate this to your parents. 

In many cases, parents speed up the spouse-hunting or marriage process once they know their kids are ready. 

If you are shy and speaking to your parents directly is a no-no, consider talking to someone you are comfortable with. Ask them to communicate your desire for marriage to your parents. This could be a sibling, an uncle, or an aunt. Also work with them to build a strong case in case your parents are reluctant. Work like a team for success! 

Make Dua

There’s nothing more powerful than dua. Channel your overwhelming desire to get married in your duas. Talk to Allah SWT. Tell Him SWT you want to get married to avoid falling into sin and ask Him SWT to help you. 

Try getting up in the middle of the night for Tahajjud (night prayer). Pray at least two Rakahs (units of prayer) and make dua. Ask Allah SWT to change your parent’s hearts. Supplicate to Him SWT asking Him SWT to facilitate your marriage. 

Also, don’t be hasty. Allah SWT has a plan for you and will answer your dua when the time is right. Just be consistent in asking Him SWT and you will find Him SWT answering you and comforting you every time. 

Be Patient and Don’t Lose Your Cool

Trying to convince your parents for marriage can be nerve-wracking. It can become very easy for you to start getting impatient and lose your composure. But make sure to stay calm and be patient. Remember, you don’t want to fall into a grave sin i.e. misbehaving with or being unkind to your parents to avoid another i.e. haram relationships. 

Remember, Taqwa (God Consciousness) is the key to earning Allah SWT’s divine help. And as you take up the difficult task and figure out how to convince your parents for marriage, make sure to hold on to Taqwa to maximise your chances of success. 

Read our last posts: Valentine’s Day – A Lookback and One Critical Question, Allah SWT Does Not Answer My Prayers, Winter Escapades.

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